our hero learns about making drug busts, the hard way

EXT-  NIGHT.  HELL’S KITCHEN

CRAZYHORSE with his “SAFETY“ shirt, is leading two Guardian Angels, STUDMUFFIN and SPIDERMAN, out on patrol.

 

STUDMUFFIN

 Right there!  Right there!  That guy has drugs!

 

CRAZYHORSE approaches a shabbily dressed SUSPECT and corners him.

 

                                CRAZYHORSE

Alright, get up against the wall.

 

 

                                SUSPECT

Excuse me?

 

                                CRAZYHORSE

I said get the fuck up against the wall!  Now!

 

SUSPECT moves to a wall giving CRAZYHORSE a dirty look.

 

                                                CRAZYHORSE

Studmuffin, where are the drugs?

 

                                                STUDMUFFIN

They’re under his coat.

 

                                                CRAZYHORSE

Empty out your pockets.

 

                                                SUSPECT

                                How about you, empty out MY DICK, motherfucker?

 

                                                SPIDERMAN

                                You going to let him talk to you like that?

 

               

                                                CRAZYHORSE

Sir, you better empty out those pockets now or you       are going             to have some serious problems.

 

                                                SPIDERMAN

                                (to STUDMUFFIN)

                He called him sir.

 

                                                SUSPECT

                What the fuck you gonna do?  Arrest me?  You ain’t  cops.  Arrest me                   bitch! 

 

                                                CRAZYHORSE

If you don’t want to empty your pockets, we’ll get the police down here and they’ll empty your pockets.

 

                                                SUSPECT

Fine.  You punks wanna see what I got.  Here’s what I    got.  Cigarettes and a pen.  You happy now?

 

SUSPECT’s pockets are now turned inside out.  SPIDERMAN examines cigarettes.

 

                                               

                                                 SUSPECT

               Sure, help yourself.

 

                                                  SPIDERMAN

               Shoes too.

 

                                                 SUSPECT

                                             (kicking off shoes)

              You better hope I don’t catch you out in the street.

            

                                                 STUDMUFFIN   

              I know the drugs were there.  He must’ve tossed ‘em. 

 

                                                  SPIDERMAN

             It’s because Crazyhorse took too long.

 

Print Print | Sitemap
© davidfrancisblanc